“Teenagers can afford to worry a little more. What they need is a compass — something to show them which way to go. This book clears away the anxiety and confusion, and builds a spirit that won‘t break.”
— Dr. Hanazawa Shion, psychiatrist

★ A relationship guide written specifically for teenagers — grounded in Adlerian psychology and the principle that “all problems are interpersonal problems.” Recommended by psychiatrist Dr. Hanazawa Shion.
★ The author, Iwai Toshinori, is Japan‘s leading expert on Adlerian psychology — with 40+ years of experience, over 200,000 students, and more than 60 books to his name. This is psychology you can actually use.
★ Six manga-based scenarios bring real teen struggles to life: “I’m smiling with everyone, but I feel empty inside” → “Why does opening up make things awkward?” → “How do I deal with a teacher who‘s unfair?” — every situation feels personal.
★ Instead of telling teens to “just stop caring,” this book gives them practical, usable tools — like the “2:6:2 rule of relationships” and the “5:5 balance point” — to help them stop overthinking, find their footing, and finally feel less anxious about what others think.
★ Suitable for readers from upper elementary school through high school. Great for independent reading, and even better for parents and teachers to explore alongside young people.

“Why does every conversation feel like a test? Why do I replay awkward moments in my head for hours?”
Friendships. Relationships with teachers and seniors. Family dynamics. For teenagers, these can feel like a constant source of anxiety, second-guessing, and overthinking.
This book doesn’t offer abstract theories — it gives teenagers a clear, step-by-step framework to stop overthinking and start connecting with confidence. Drawing on Alfred Adler‘s core insights — including the idea that every problem we face is ultimately a problem of connection — it shows young readers how to separate their own needs from others’ expectations, find courage in belonging, and build social confidence without losing themselves in the process.
The book is structured around five core themes: why relationships feel so exhausting, what friends are really for, how to handle the power imbalance with adults, what to do with the anxiety and anger that relationships stir up, and why family dynamics shape everything else.
Each chapter opens with a relatable manga scene that drops readers straight into a familiar dilemma — laughing along with classmates while feeling hollow inside, saying something honest and watching a friendship cool, or being told what to do by an adult who doesn‘t seem to listen. From there, it walks readers through the Adlerian concepts that apply to that situation, then gives them concrete steps they can try the next day. A self-assessment checklist helps readers identify their own relationship patterns, with tailored advice for each type.
Written in plain, accessible language with full furigana for younger readers, this book works equally well for teens reading on their own and for parents or teachers who want to understand what’s going on beneath the surface.

Iwai Toshinori (b. 1947, Tochigi Prefecture) is a graduate of Waseda University. He is the founder and CEO of Human Guild Inc., a certified Adlerian psychotherapist and counselor, and a certified small business consultant. After years in management at a foreign-affiliated company, he founded Human Guild in 1985.
Over the past four decades, he has delivered training and lectures to more than 240,000 people across corporate, educational, and community settings. He has authored or supervised over 60 books on Adlerian psychology, including the bestselling “Manga de Yasashiku Wakaru Adler Psychology” series.

Chapter 1: Why Are Relationships So Draining?
Trying hard, but still struggling to connect
How teenage relationships are both risky and full of potential
Self-assessment: what‘s your relationship style?

Chapter 2: Do I Actually Need Friends?
Can you say anything as long as you’re friends?
Is something wrong with you if you don‘t have many friends?
Why do compliments sometimes backfire?

Chapter 3: Senpai, Kouhai, Teachers — Navigating the Power Gap
Do you have to respect a teacher you can’t stand?
Is it okay to push back?
What can you learn from older people, even when it‘s hard?

Chapter 4: What to Do with All the Fog and Frustration
What does “right” even mean?
Why anxiety and impatience hit so hard in adolescence
How to handle anger without burning bridges

Chapter 5: Family — The Root of It All
How long do you have to do what your parents say?
Is it weird if you don’t feel close to your family?
How do you deal with parents who see things completely differently?